spiritual

Real Talk

Real talk, how many of you have gone through hardship in silence?

How many of you went through said hardship and felt alone?

Now, how many of you think that if you would have just said something to someone who loved you you might have felt less alone?

Some of us experience loneliness by choice. Some of us get so wrapped up in our life and it’s situations that we forget that there are people outside of our household that sincerely love us. We become so laser focused on how to fix things ourselves that we lose sight of the big picture. I know this because I’ve fallen victim to it myself. By choice.

I don’t know if it was pride, insecurity, or what. I do know that I dealt with certain things alone and I now know that I never had to. I know that in my loneliness I was tempted to reach out. Countless times I convinced myself not to pick up the phone. Countless times I’d answer the question “how are you?” With “great how are you?” When things weren’t always so great. I did it as a safety mechanism I assume. I figured the less people I let in the less hurt I could feel. Unfortunately, that wasn’t always the case. I myself did enough hurt to myself. You see, by not asking for help when I needed it it caused me to suffer for a longer time. Sure, I recovered. I sought Christ and he always met me where I was. However, looking back I could have overcome some of what I have gone through if I just trusted the ones I love more. I’m blessed to have learned this lesson sooner then later. I now know that it’s ok to talk. It’s ok to ask, and it’s ok to not look like you have it all together. All of us are going through something and some of us might be doing it better then others. That’s ok. Just don’t forget you’re not alone. If you truly have no one to talk to feel free to reach out. I may not have all of the answers but, I have a listening ear, an open heart and I know someone who does have all of the answers.

I pray you are encouraged today, encouraged to ask for help if you need it. Encouraged to not be lonely. Encouraged to love yourself enough to seek love, and peace through Jesus.

In his love,

Mrs_Noso

He’s my umbrella.

Hi my beautiful people!

Today was such a gloomy day.

This morning, as I was getting ready to leave, I opened the garage door and immediately thought to myself “ I hope it’s not rainy like this tomorrow” …..I had barely started my day and I was already concerned about my plans for the next day.

Why, have I been so hardwired to think so little of my own plans? That the second a little storm comes the joys of tomorrow are put on the back burner? I thought “That just can’t be right”.

Then, I heard in my spirit, “Don’t allow todays weather determine tomorrow’s forecast”. Wow!!! Isn’t it like me to see a little rain and drastically Think tomorrow’s plans have to change.??!!! And, isn’t it like God to just put things back into perspective! You see, When God directs your path, no rain, or storm should ever get in your way. If God is telling you it’s time to get things done then dance in the rain and get them done! Don’t let the rain stop you. Don’t cancel your purpose or the plans that God has purposed in you. Keep going. Tomorrow, may be brighter and better then today. Don’t allow yourself to worry about it. Simply give yourself the time to embrace it.

When I heard that in my Spirit, I thought of all of the time I must have wasted worrying about tomorrows plans because of today’s storm. Don’t cancel tomorrow because of today. Fulfill your purpose. Fulfill your plans. Do what’s in your heart and allow the Holy Spirit to guide you. Apply for the job, say hi to the girl, start that journal entry. If it’s edifying to you and the kingdom Just get it done. Don’t Stop, Because when God is for you, he’s your umbrella on a rainy day. 😛 xoxo

Be Encouraged

Mrs_Noso

Chameleons they are NOT

I love all things comedy. If you can make me laugh we can be best friends. It’s really that simple.

So when my husband and I first starting talking he could make me laugh until I cried! He still can. His humor is a huge reason I fell in love. Now, after almost 12 years of marriage and three kids later, I’ve got my own comedy routine at home. Put him and my kiddos together and I’m laughing until I’m running to the bathroom peeing on my self (I know TMI).

Now, the only problem with them being so funny is that our sense of humor isn’t always appreciated by everyone. Don’t get me wrong; we’re not mean or anything! It’s just not everyone’s cup of tea. Sometimes, when my daughter cracks a joke around other family members or friends she gets a stare. When my middle child makes a funny it sometimes goes unnoticed (he’ll usually say it under his breath). When my youngest does it he just drops the mic. Each of them at the end of any given day can tell me about a joke they cracked through their experiences and how the person was so lame that they didn’t get it. That’s right, if people don’t get their humor the kids aren’t the problem the people are. (I’m a bit biased lol)

You see, my goal isn’t to raise chameleons. My goal is to raise proper humans that aren’t jerks and know how to laugh and have fun. All while serving the one and only Son of God Jesus Christ. Life isn’t a popularity contest. It’s new to all of us. We need to enjoy being who we are with our individual sense of style, humor and personality. I’ve noticed to many parents comparing their kids to others instead of embracing who they’ve been raising. I am not the perfect momager I promise! But I am the perfect one for them and they are perfect for me.

If your kid is trying to brighten someone’s day and attempts to make them laugh…..let them. It might not be perfect comedic timing but, it’ll give them the opportunity to learn who their audience is and who might not be. Either way there should be a learning in every laugh.

In his love

Mrs_Noso

Just call me “the momager”

Hello my beautiful people.

I hope you’ve been having a fantastically beautiful day. As most of you know I’m a full time working mom of three. Thankfully, I have an amazing family that supports me and is always willing to give a helping hand. I wouldn’t be a successful manager or momager if not for the lord and my family.

With all of that said, today, I had to put my critical thinking managerial hat on in order to “mom manage” my 5 year old. My little guy is NOT a morning person. He doesn’t rise and shine. In fact his rise is more like a slow roll to the ground while whining on the way down. He drags himself to the bathroom all while managing to piss off his siblings in minutes. He takes his morning rain cloud everywhere he goes. Even virtual school. Today, his rain cloud made it’s way to his teacher, his Buela, and eventually me “the momager”.

While getting him ready for his day, I could feel that the day could go south at any moment. So, I made sure to put on my happy face and do nothing but breath positivity into him. He had a few moments, but, all in all it was not a terrible morning. Until, he made the decision to turn south.

Now, here I am at work, on a Monday morning, attempting to encourage my team to face the challenges of the day, while my Apple Watch wont stop buzzing. To no surprise it’s my mom. She writes, “Aaron is having a bad morning, I have spoken to him and the teacher. He just stopped”

. …….JUST STOPPED?! ……He just decided that his school day was going to be over at 9:01. Now, Mind you, I’ve been at work for only 31 minutes at this point. So I ignore it. Then my watch buzzes again “He is totally telling the teacher he is not doing it”

………NOT DOING IT!????……Like, if he’s in charge. At that moment I had a choice to make.

So, I tell my employees “I’ll be right back”. I hop in my truck and off I go. Headed home at 9:15. All I can do is pray. All I can do is ask for self control, and for God to order my steps. Because, in my own flesh I wanted to throw something across the wall!! I get home and my mom lays it all out. Aaron is just staring at me. Fear is painted all over his face. I tell him “go get your shoes and your mask”. I ask my mom for his left over assignments; him and I leave. I take him to the lake and we sit and watch the ducks. This entire time I’m trying not to cry. Trying not to yell, trying not to break, Trying to explain to him why he can’t go to actual school yet, trying to explain that every morning he has to make a choice. But he’s only 5.

So we sit quietly and watch the ducks. He asks me questions about the ducks wings, and if they get cold in the water. I’m able to sneak in a few words about how I love him and want him to listen. I don’t yell. I’m simply trying to figure out how to manage. We get back in the car and I take him to work. While sending a few emails I help him complete his assignments. Once he’s done he wants to leave. BAM! My moment has arrived. “No Aaron, you wanted to sit at your desk and do nothing today. Now, you can have what you wanted. You can sit and do nothing.” Aaron: “But mom I have to finish school” Me: “No, Aaron, you did finish, and now you get to sit.” So, he sat for over an hour. Doing nothing. He got what he wanted.

Then I hear is tummy rumble. “Aaron are you hungry?” He replies “yes mommy” I say “ok baby lunch is in an hour. His eye opened wide!” “But I’m hungry I want to eat now” “Sorry baby, you didn’t want to be in school so now you have to wait”. He was not a happy camper! He sat there pouting and spinning in his new office chair. After a while we get packed up and leave. I go to a local diner and he gets to order whatever he wants. While we sit he gets upset realizing he can’t go to his grandma’s house. I explain to him that everything that’s happening is because he made a choice. He chose not to be cooperative, he chose not to listen, and he chose to give up on his work. He continues to eat his silver dollar pancakes with a sour look on his face. He goes In and out of smiling and pouting like kids do. We then wrap up lunch and head home. We get home and I put him right to bed. While he’s in bed he starts crying and calling out for me. I don’t answer. Then he calls out for Mochi our dog and she barks! He must have realized Mochi was no hello so he evenuallly calmed down and fell asleep.

It’s 1pm and here I am. At home writing to you. I should be at work managing my office. Creating strategies with my bankers on how to engage clients, how to connect with our community and how to help people reach their financial goals. But, I’m not. At this moment I’m at home. I’m where I need to be for right now. At home being a mom while my little guy takes the nap he needs to rest this not so easy morning.

I don’t know how many working mom’s might read this post today but if you are a working mom I’m with you. In prayer and in love. It’s not easy, it’s ok to cry. It’s ok to feel frustrated, it’s ok to make a choice once in awhile. Just make sure that when you do it’s always them. Always choose your kids. Over your meeting, over your employees and over anything else that might get in the way. Your time and prayer with them and for them is what’s going to get their little rain cloud to go away. It’s what’s going to give them the strength to one day make the same choice you made. God and family over everything.

With love,

Mrs_Noso

Embarrassing

Since when did trying to look your best become embarassing?

So many people go through their lives feeling ugly, frumpy and yucky. They hate what they see in the mirror and they wish they saw something else. Some people are so frustrated with their own appearance that they stop trying all together. They wear the same clothes day in and day out. They don’t do their hair and they don’t care to try. When they do speak they are are whiny, obnoxious and live in a pity party. Constantly complaining about what they have to do. Not realizing how blessed they are to be able to do those things.

Now, don’t get me wrong people go through phases in their lives. People get sad and overwhelmed. People become parents and don’t have the energy but most people get through those stages and eventually have an ‘AH HA!” moment. Some people go through funks! I get it!I mean I’ve been there! I’m not talking about that. I’m also not referring to people that are diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I am simply speaking about people that complain about their appearance and refuse to do anything about it.

The other day I was speaking to a friend about this topic. We simply came to the conclusion that some people are so down on themselves that they become embarrassed to even try. It’s actually very sad. In my very humble opinion I believe you should never stop trying to be the best version of yourself. If you are overweight and want to get healthy embrace who you are right now and do what you gotta do to hit your goal. If you don’t want to lose weight then that’s ok too. It doesn’t mean you stop trying to look and feel your best. It’s ok to style your hair differently. It’s ok to wear lip gloss and get a new blouse. Don’t be embarrassed about it. Don’t not do it because you’re worried about what people might think or say. The heck with the haters! For crying out loud if you don’t want to try that’s even ok. BUT, then please, don’t complain about it!!!!! Just look in the mirror and make the choice to love the skin that you are in or zip your lip. Look, however you might look right now OWN IT! And take the steps to be the best you that you can be.

Hearing you whine and complain about things you CAN do and CAN change is frustrating. Stop giving yourself excuses. There is enough time. There are enough resources and you CAN be who you want to see in the mirror. BUT it WILL take work. You can be the best version of yourself if you allow yourself to try and stop getting embarassed about it. Just be the beautiful, perfectly imperfect, man or woman of God that the almighty has created you to be.

For you were bought with a price 1st Corinthians 6:20

With Love,

Mrs_Noso

Usually

I usually have something to say about any topic. Whether I know about the topic is a totally different conversation. You see I’ve worked 15+ years in customer service. While working in the customer service field you learn how to have small conversations with anyone that is in front of you. Now, most conversations do not contain much substance, but they are conversations non the less. For example, a client comes in to conduct business and my job is to make them feel all warm and fuzzy while finding out lots of fun stuff about them. Once I find out the fun stuff I can eventually get to the meat and potatoes of the visit then we explore our options from there. While on this conversation journey I am at times introduced to topics that I’m not to familiar with. For instance, I have never gone on an actual hike, but if my client is an avid hiker I would simply say ‘WOW hiking is an incredible way to stay fit! Is that your secret?’ If a woman of course……. if a man I would say something like ‘WOW hiking is such a great way to escape the mundane! what else do you do for fun? (Now, you might wonder why I change my approach; and the quickest way to answer is because I’m married and I do my best to consider him. If I ask a man about how he stays fit it may seem flirtatious and I don’t want to go down that rabbit hole.) Any way, I know how to make small talk. Now, on the other hand there are people in my life that I see regularly and I just can’t figure out what the heck to say to them. We just do not click! I mean, I want to click, I want to make small talk, or long talk, or even end up as besties but it just does not happen. Now, these individuals are close to people that I love dearly. I mean, I see them a few times a year and would even be able to call them distant relatives and still nothing! Nada, Zilch ZERO! I have examined myself, I have spoken to to my husband, I have tried to figure it out and after years of wondering I’m just deciding to let it go. We are just not meant to be friends and I am ok with that! I really don’t even care for their personalities (no offense) we really just don’t click! I officially have decided to stop trying to fit a puzzle piece into my life that doesn’t fit. In me doing this I truly believe it’ll show my kids that they don’t have to entertain people that they don’t want to. If they don’t click with someone it’s ok. They don’t have to force it, or fake it. They don’t have to feel bad or wonder why. They can simply say hello and good bye.

If you find yourself sticking around people that you just don’t click with and you are tired of trying you can just stop. Yeah, I said it stop trying to make the piece fit into your puzzle when it doesn’t belong. At the end of the day as long as you are still being a light in the midst of darkness you don’t have to be everyone’s friends. Let them go and let God handle the rest.

In his love

-Mrs Noso

Plain Rude

I did something out of my comfort zone recently.

This Saturday I woke up with an important project on my mind. For this project I chose to look my best. So, I woke up early, picked my clothes, showered, did my hair and makeup and was ready to go! On most days this would be a normal occurrence, but, for a working mother of three (during a pandemic) it’s less then normal.

Anyway, I felt cute. I even took a selfie! From the perfect angle of course. You know, the one where you hold the phone super high and tilt your head ever so slightly while giving your camera the look of death. YUP THAT ONE!

So now, I’m ready to start my project. Everyone is sitting around the table and the camera is rolling. Suddenly, all I could think about was how I looked. Were my rolls showing? Am I sitting up straight enough? Are my hips visibly hanging over the seat? Every thought in my mind of me being cute was now out the window. POOF!!!……… GONE! All confidence shot to hell!

Now, don’t get me wrong. I was confident in what I was saying. I was sincere and present in the moment, but initially my mind was off to the races! Now after we were done I wanted to see a few photos that were taken. And of course my fears became a reality I looked atrocious!!!

Of Course, like any good wife, I vented to my husband about it that evening.

Here we are in bed and I go off about myself. I tell him that I looked chunky and that I shouldn’t have been in front of the camera. I told him that I need to lose more weight and my current efforts are failing miserably. I told him I looked like a potato!! YUP A POTATO!! Yes, I told my husband that the women of his choosing. The mother of his children, and the one he plans to grow old with looked like trash……..(YIKES)……Then he looks up at me with his big orange eyes and simply says “No, Dinorah, you look like you’re sitting at a table having a conversation”.

He didn’t tell me I was beautiful. He didn’t tell me it’ll be ok. He didn’t play into my self pity. He told me “No”. It was then I realized I wasn’t insulting just myself. I was insulting him. I was talking about his wife. I was talking about someone he loves. In that very instant I made a decision to NEVER insult myself again!

Now, it might be difficult because I tell him how I feel about everything…… but it’s not healthy for him to hear about my feelings all of the time. I came to understand that I’m much more critical of myself then anyone else. I also realized that when I insult myself I’m also insulting him.

Please, hear my heart. It IS ok to speak to your spouse about your insecurities and pain. I’m not saying that it’s not. In fact it’s healthy. However, it’s not ok to verbally abuse yourself and expect your spouse not to hurt from it too. They also have feelings and most of the time they keep it to themselves because of your insecurities. Them saying “NO” should be enough.

So, if you regularly speak ill of yourself please STOP. It doesn’t help, it doesn’t change anything, and it’s just plain RUDE! Love yourself because Christ loves you.

Love always,

MrsNoso